Currently Crushing On


"Money did buy these" The Boob Job Diaries - Part 2

So I'm now 2 weeks+ post op and feeling much more my normal self, unless I have to tackle stairs at speed that is... 

Last Friday I went for my one week check where my surgeon removed my sticky bandages and examined his handiwork - again, awkward. Luckily my implants didn't immediately drop out of the bottom of my chest wall in a shower of blood and pus as I had envisaged and my surgeon deemed them to be rather successful. If he'd had a sticker and lollipop handy I'm more than certain that he would have presented them to me, maybe at my 3 month check?

I also had my stitches "out" which was a far less traumatic experience then I had anticipated. I was thinking, searing pain, blood spraying up walls etc... Actually I just lay down and felt a bit of tugging as the ends of the dis-solvable stitches were snipped and my incisions were covered with something suspiciously resembling masking tape. I may well use the excess for arts and crafts

So what do think about them now they've settled down a bit? Well, having a boob job is rather like giving a child and Xbox and then telling them they can't play with it for  months... all these gorgeous summer clothes and it's Sports Bra central for me... They've now, mercifully, dropped a bit and I'm proudly rocking a cleavage following my previous fears over the "third-boob gap" between them. The numbness I experienced in my left breast has now subsided and been replaced with a rather unpleasant stabbing sensation, rather like when you regain the feeling following a particularly aggressive bout of "pins and needles" 

My new boobs also make some freaky noises... Yep that's right they make noises! Whilst scrubbing the fake tan off my body (bane of my life) I reached my breasts to hear a disturbing sloshing sound. EIW! They also emit sporadic creaking noises, which was verified by a friend who had also had her boobs done some years ago. "Oh I forgot about the creaking!" she exclaimed... "The creaking" - like I'm an old rocking chair? Seriously, this is the stuff they don't tell you about

Before and After - How was I gonna bullshit my way out of that one?

Out and about the reaction to my new boobs has been pretty positive. The only exception has been when someone posed the question? Why did you feel you had to do that to look attractive? Well... Why do we do anything to feel attractive really? How long is a piece of string? Truthfully I would rather they weren't dragging about in the sand on my wedding day. Although I know for some people getting any type of cosmetic surgery can be a deep and thought provoking process, for me it was more a case of fixing something that was broken. Being able to express milk for my daughter was one of the main things that kept me sane during her 4 and half month in hospital so obviously I wouldn't have changed that for the world. I merely sought to address the physiological effects of this process by enlisting surgical intervention. Plus I want to look banging in a bikini again 

I've also had LOADS of positive feedback from people who have had surgery and/or are considering it. In a world where women are constantly pressurised by celebrity culture to look a certain way I didn't actually feel it was fair to jump on the "look how good I look after childbirth" bandwagon. Yes I lost my baby weight, but this was mainly through stress and YES I have a pretty decent pair of tits now but I paid for them, with my own money. Having surgery doesn't impact directly upon either my personality, morals, mothering ability or mentality - mostly it just affects my bank balance and the contents of my fiances trousers. Essentially it boils down to this: body-shaming is bad, complimenting is good! Regardless  of whether you're a natural beauty or even if you had a little help along the way, lets not be bitches

I'll post again about my progress if anything interesting crops up but do feel free to email and leave (nice) comments if you have a specific questions you would like answered
You can read Part One of "Money DID buy these" by clicking: Here

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